Guy : Up and Atom
Ed McBain : Upp Und Atom
Guy : Up And Atom
Ed MaBain : Op An Atom
Guy : Up and atom
Ed McBain : Up an Atom
Guy : Better.

Ed : Did you ever noticed how  men always keep the toilet seet up ?.....  that's the joke
Guy In  Audience : You Suck McBain.
(gun Shots)

Ed McBain : My son returns from a fancy east-coast college, and I'm terrified to find out he's a nerd.

Ed : That is one outfit Scoey. It makes you look like a homosexual.
Crowd : BOO...
ED : Maybe you all are homosexuals too...
Crowd : BOO...

More to come....